everything changes, everything falls apart

This moment

Thu, 10 Sep 2009 06:08:43 GMT

too much inside of me
emotional destruction
wont let you have me

vulnerable evening
so far up
so far down...down...down

here i am fumbling my excuses to stay
what sorry excuses are they
thoughtful words forgotten long ago

i must walk away
my heart tugs NO

hearts will lie in moments like these
i have seen it before
not just in the movies

when the eyes wander
so does the heart

walk away
it will be hard

you are not born a woman..you become one.

Wed, 20 Feb 2008 21:36:37 GMT

so much has changed in the past couple years. hard to explain really..all that i know is that i am glad to finally be where i am.

by wisdom a house is built.

distance

Mon, 24 Sep 2007 00:54:56 GMT

sometimes ii feel so distant
from this world
this world that surrounds me
sometimes i am just a hypacrite
some days i wish i could stay inside my brain
without interruption
meditation
go beyond this
moments..some days i feel alone
most days i am happy to be alone
strange
what i want. what i feel
just mysteries
unsure
truth i says truth is worth finding
well why
why is truth so hard to accept sometimes? ..damn ego!

somedays you will find me with a puzzle written on my face
you will pin me for angry/upset
i do not wish for questions or comments
simply alone time.
i love my feel time. my think time. simply my time.
the past couple of years it has been extremely hard for me to let people in my life.
im not really sure if that is destructive or careless..
i need to open up.
problem is..when people surround me all i want to do is hide.
observe.
i like space. must find space.

go climb a tree!! EXACTLY!! =]

you are my strength

Thu, 19 Oct 2006 19:48:10 GMT

up-state of mind

Wed, 30 Aug 2006 09:06:25 GMT

i cannot wait
nothing has ever felt so real or right
breathing in crisp fresh humboldt county air
watching people walk by that look nothing like the people back home
some have similar styles but something is still so very different
it lies in the eyes
they have depth, truth and love behind those eyes
i am fully anticipating sharing a town with these wonderful souls
and to share the experience with the ONE i truly love the most

if any of you out there in internet land see me one day
and think to yourself[or gossip to all of your pals]
whoa...that girl is different, she didnt used to be like that in high school
damn fucking right
i am no longer suppressed by my own insecurities
you wont see me with pounds of make-up on my face or trying to blend in at some show
i have been there and i will try my best not to judge you for the choices you make
but i will always wish more for you
dont get me wrong i have insecurities but i am just learning to embrace them
i am strong
strong for what i have been through
strong for what i have seen
strong for embracing change
we are all strong if we allow ourselves to be

i have love
and by love i do not mean a simple word thrown between two people
i mean what i cant describe yet is written all over my face

Mon, 01 May 2006 02:21:39 GMT

hope

horoscope

Tue, 28 Feb 2006 07:53:04 GMT

today
It's time to listen to the universe. Believe it or not, there's a specific destiny in mind for you, a divine place that only you can fill. The path may not be easy, but you can climb it if you have some faith
tomorrow
How well do you understand yourself? Come on -- be honest. You may understand a few things, but there are far more layers and complications than you think. Spend some time paying attention to your inner workings

to see is a choice

Tue, 28 Feb 2006 07:27:48 GMT

this is all to strange to comprehend
wait i take that back
it is strange to know that so many do not comprehend nor care to comprehend reality
i really dont enjoy thinking of what is to come of our world
if only everyone had to figure things out for themselves
maybe more would search for real truth
truth beyond the comfortable tradition most are spoon-fed from the moment they enter this world
truth beyond a figure. truth beyond materialism. truth beyond "truth"

Mon, 30 Jan 2006 19:37:33 GMT

Ten Top Trivia Tips about Kristen!

There are more than two hundred different kinds of kristen!
The difference between kristen and a village is that kristen does not have a church!
A chimpanzee can learn to recognize itself in a mirror, but kristen can not!
There is no lead in a lead pencil - it is simply a stick of graphite mixed with kristen and water.
You should always store kristen in an airtight container in the fridge.
Only fifty-five percent of men wash their hands after using kristen!
Kristen can eat up to four kilograms of insects in a single night!
Kristenicide is the killing of kristen!
Baby swans are called kristen.
An average beaver can cut down kristen every year!

key to life[or something of similar value]

Thu, 12 Jan 2006 10:28:01 GMT

realizing that you already have everything you need.

yes, such a simple statement...but once you finally SEE that you already have everything you need, everything else seems so insignificant, so silly.

meet kuma

Thu, 12 Jan 2006 08:07:22 GMT

inappropriate sensitivity[its true]

Wed, 11 Jan 2006 19:46:09 GMT

Your Birthdate: March 1

You are a natural born leader, even if those leadership talents haven't been developed yet.
You have the power and self confidence to succeed in life, and your power grows daily.
Besides power, you also have a great deal of creativity that enables you to innovate instead of fail.
You are a visionary, seeing the big picture instead of all of the trivial little details.

Your strength: Your supreme genius

Your weakness: Your inappropriate sensitivity

Your power color: Gold

Your power symbol: Star

Your power month: January

What Does Your Birth Date Mean?

Tue, 10 Jan 2006 03:23:17 GMT

i used to admire my father.
i used to hold such respect for that man in my heart.
i used to believe that he was different.

things change.

i have so much to sort out.

Thu, 29 Dec 2005 18:01:29 GMT

if there are a bunch of random posts...dont stress about it.

i wish i could have wrote it myself...

Thu, 29 Dec 2005 08:40:35 GMT

To laugh often and much; To win the respect of intelligent people and the affection of children; To earn the appreciation of honest critics and endure the betrayal of false friends; To appreciate beauty, to find the best in others; To leave the world a bit better, whether by a healthy child, a garden patch or a redeemed social condition; To know even one life has breathed easier because you have lived.

This is to have succeeded.

as if you will be reading my livejournal....

Fri, 23 Dec 2005 07:07:15 GMT

more than a few drinks for more than just a farewell.
this is a celabration of her life
i have so much respect for this woman who has taught and shared so very much with me.
life comes and goes and to be very honest noone really truly KNOWS what is to come next
a mind opening experience
a life altering breathe
i cant help but hurt, as insignificant as that feels
a true woman i am so very proud to have known
i will know her forever
and she will live on in my walk
cheers to my sue
you were always so much more than a companions mother to me
thank you always

Wed, 21 Dec 2005 19:42:35 GMT

painful realizations
set in
over and over again
i try to bob my head and not listen to what they say
but i am too attentive
for my own good
why is it that conformity is praised
while creativity is pushed under
tradition is comfortable
conformity is comfortable
i just have to keep reminding myself
that i am not in search of the comfortable things in this life

Mon, 19 Dec 2005 00:16:26 GMT

dig deeper.

Tue, 13 Dec 2005 15:33:14 GMT

To sin by silence when they should protest makes cowards of men. --Abraham Lincoln

Thu, 08 Dec 2005 03:02:44 GMT

silence rings loud and clear

Wed, 07 Dec 2005 05:46:44 GMT

we have it easy, we should all take it easy.

todays journey...[[random statement]]

Tue, 06 Dec 2005 07:08:20 GMT

peace is free. some may be quick to slander against this statement, but let yourself think a minute before letting your fingers fly. the pathway to our future is not only through technology...i believe we must learn to stop and think...

note to all

Wed, 30 Nov 2005 20:52:45 GMT

get rad.

Sun, 27 Nov 2005 08:18:04 GMT

new addiction=arizona Energy herbal tonic

clense- To free from dirt, defilement, or guilt; purge or clean.

Sat, 26 Nov 2005 09:14:58 GMT

and by the times she's finished, she's almost completely shown you how she felt without even saying a word.